What Community? #43: Chris Mullen willing to forgo Monta.

Bill, aka Pager Code, has been dreaming of this return since the playoffs started. Well, it's not set in stone -- it's just an offer right now -- but it looks like Chris Mullen is ready to risk losing Monta, or at least making him a lesser cog, for the opportunity to right the wrong of letting Gil go to the Wiz in the first place. Granted, they didn't have the cash to match the Wiz's offer, and they're not allowed to give Gil the six years the Wiz are allowed to offer, and the Warriors don't have his boy, Antawn, anymore (locked up real quick by Grunfeld: 4yr/$50m), and they may lose Fast Andy on top of Monta, but *sheeeeeeit* they've got to be an attractive option right? Hmn. Seems like Gil wants to stay in DC anyways, and will look to leverage this interest into that real deal max contract he wants.

Me? I think he'd be a lot of fun to root for again, sure. But we've got version 2.0 in Monta, who may yet develop that 3-ball, and who is not coming off serious knee injuries, and who is a mere 22 to Gil's 26, who can get his shot from anywhere (it seems) like Gil, who is faster than a speeding bullet, who...you get the picture: he's a great building block and possible All-Star. But, Monta hasn't dropped 60 on anybody. Nor has he hit game winners from 30 feet in back to back games. Nor has he averaged 30ppg. Nor is he a blogger extraordinaire. Of course, this presupposes it's an either/or kinda deal. And, of course, it is: can you really see the two of them getting paid their worth and playing well together on the Warriors? Well, I guess it could happen; and it'd be beautiful, probably. But I just don't see it. I think it's a fine dream, but improbable. Kinda like that last score dream all those robbers in cops-and-robbers movies propose but never follow through on. --RWK [via Sporting Blog]

What Community? #42: The Redeem Team.

First off: who said what about Dwight Howard? And why is Michael Redd the only one grossed out? Is D-Wade hiding? Next: I think they'll get the gold. Even without much interior size. I don't know what the "experts" are talking about: there's plenty of shooters out there. Melo and Kobe from the wings? Redd off the bench? Deron has a beard now? Wait: Deron has a beard now. He really is the next best thing after, okay he's better than, Baron. They're one consonant sound away as it is. (Also, D's look like B's only bigger.) Anyways: glad they're having a good time. The new era of the NBA starts this summer. --RWK

What Community? #41: Chuck's vision of Philly.

Chuck doesn't know as much about baseball as he does about basketball but he seems to know a thing or two about Philly and double standards. It's an obvious argument, sure, but that's why people like Chuck: he'll say shit. His punchline here is worth the whole video. Cuz it's probably true. --RWK [via]

Genius Marketing? #27: Dominoes sponsors Batman.

The new trailer actually has some cool new footage. But, wait, Dominoes? They'll go to any and every end possible to promote this thing. It better gross outrageous sums of money. I'm talking Titanic outrageous. If not, well, it'll sure be a waste of ad time -- and money. Cuz I care about this shit. Really. ...not? Really, though -- to be really real about the reality here -- I'm really sad, or maybe I'm just a little miffed, that Heath's Joker won't terrorize CB's Batman for movies to come. That would have been something to watch unfold. --RWK

What Community? #40: Baron Opts Out.

The buzz had been that Baron would not walk away from $17.8 million. Looks like he did. There's talk of The Clippers (Elton Brand and Corey Maggette opted out, too, potentially clearing some cap space) and the Knicks (D'antoni loves 3 pointers just as much as Baron; but D'antoni also like FG%, unlike BD) as possible destinations. I'm sure it's a story we'll be watching for weeks to come. But, regardless of destinations and endpoints, the only clear fact is that Boom, here, wants security. He wants to be wanted. He's no different than any of us! He's insecure, too, underneath it all! Or not.

I was coming to grips with the idea of a starting five reprise (Baron at 1, Monta at 2, Cap'n Jack at 3, Al at 4, Fast Andy at 5) with more playing time for the young guys (Belinelli spelling the backcourt, B-Rite and Randolph stretching in space at the 4). But maybe this means they sign Monta long term and put him at the 1? Despite Nelli's love, I doubt the W's resign Kalenna; I doubt we see Pietrus back; hell, isn't Patrick O'Bryant ready to bolt? If they do, somehow, manage to resign Baron and Monta and Fast Andy, tho, it'll be quite the energized team ready to win. They'll have a tough time contending with the Blazers' rise next season but I could see the W-men stepping into the playoffs ahead of the basket case Nuggets (even if they get Chauncey) and -- wait for it -- Steve Kerr's failed Suns experiment. Anyways: that's, like, a year away. For now the drama rests with number 5. Because, after that big trade, it doesn't look like Memphis will be looking at Monta after all. Although, to be honest, I worry somebody smart will offer Fast Andy a good deal the Warriors will be too stingy, and bolstered by too much confidence in B-Rite and Randolph, to match. --RWK

Encounter #93: "I don't really like Girl Talk"

Guess not since it took me until today to follow this link and download Girl Talk's Feed The Animals for free. It's pretty fun but slightly less so than Night Ripper cuz it's slower and, in general, less crazy -- if more eclectic. Blah blah blah. Enjoy it. I do. Dance. I will. Also, he'll be on tour, as ever, this summer/fall/winter/spring/forever. My friends in Seattle, in case you didn't know: he'll be at the Capitol Hill Block Party a day before Chromeo. --RWK

Encounter #92: More "real" than real?

Mary-Kate Olsen. I'm kinda feeling her here. Especially when she says some mess about "wormy," "oily" Spencer Pratt (Dave's words, not mine). At the least she seems more real than, um, Paul. Not that that's saying much, I guess. Still: I'm surprised that she seems like she's a real person after 22 long, hard years of scrutiny -- and 10 of those were spent under the watchful eyes of pervs the world over. If anything, she's a weird specimen of celebrity I'm intrigued, if not plain perplexed, by. Cuz, like, wasn't it her apartment that Heath Ledger died in? Weird.* Does that really mean he hit that? Weird.* She made out with Ben Kingsley? Weird.*** Has an affable sense of humor about it? Weird.**** I think I want to marry her. Weird.***** --RWK

* = This kinda makes me hate her, and count her as accomplice.
** = Shallow Ryland is jealous of a dead man? Weird. Is Shallow Ryland jealous? Not quite: I like living.
*** = Nah, more like "Gross."
**** = Really? She thought up that joke about Gandhi?
***** = This has drummed up way too many mixed emotions for a random blog post. Must retire from the internet for the evening.

Encounter #91 What Community? #39 Mel met Cary, told Johnny.

Back when late nite interviews still had some pizzazz. And, when Mel was more like Robin Williams than the Cheshire Cat brought down to the ground and stripped of his color thanks to a life replete with corned beef on rye with mustard. (Not to mention booze and girls and limelights.) Worth noting: I probably would have acted the same way meeting Cary Grant, except I would have told a worse version of the story. Guess that's why I'm a part of the blogosphere and not Hollywood. --RWK [via Virgil P]

Title sequences #11: Paprika

Because I'm still waiting on that Husky Boys remix. --RWK

Title sequences #10: Paranoia Agent

Satoshi Kon is the man. I wish I'd been in NYC this week. Also, in lieu of the DVD, I recently rewatched Millennium Actress on YouTube. --RWK

Genius Marketing #26 Encounter #90 The Dark Knight prologue.

You may not want to watch this but if you're anticipating The Dark Knight as much as I am (a lot, but not over the top) then the geek inside won't be able to resist. Maybe you've already seen it. It's apparently included on the Blu-Ray Batman Begins disc so I imagine it isn't brand new news but the disc doesn't hit stands for another week so this may be news, actually. I dunno. What I do know is that this is tight. Heath Ledger is pretty awesome, as expected, and there's a William Fitchner cameo. A lot of hype-heads are already calling this the greatest movie ever -- and for a lot of people I imagine it will be -- but this video, while cool, isn't going to help that argument. Also funny: it's a segment shot in IMAX, leaked on Blu-Ray and transfered to YouTube. So it's not quite as impressive as it should be. What I'm most curious about is whether or not this is actual footage from the film or if this is simply a test run with the equipment that reveals just enough but not too much to show off before the theatrical release date. In any event, it's another brilliant installment in the marketing plan for this picture. So, without further ado, feast your geeked out eyes on this grainy "Best Quality" clip. --RWK

Encounter #89: What can I say? She's right.

By most accounts a stupid and hateful movie, Domino is never boring, nor as incomprehensible as its many detractors shout. Indeed, it is stupid and macho and, on the whole, too much in all the wrong places (too little elsewhere), but it's so fucking campy I couldn't resist it. On top of that, I'm getting the feeling that if Tony Scott ever gets a good screenplay like he did with the first half of Deja Vu (a closet favorite, especially those first few encounters in the little room with the big gadget), he's bound to make a film for the ages. I don't think The Taking of Pelham 123 will be that movie -- in fact, I don't think he'll ever make that movie -- but it's nice to dream some times. At night. I gave Domino 3 stars out of 5 on Netflix when it probably only deserves 2. It's my own bought and paid for rating system (thank you very much) *cough* so I'll do whatever I want. Also, I'll dream. (Why does she look best with short hair? Am I crazy?) --RWK

Genius Marketing #25 What Community? #38 A love story filmed on location in the 21st Century.

I wish this movie was better, or simply more fun. Most of what's great about it is due to the people Lucas hired, and not Lucas (although it is surprising that, at least nominally, he edited the picture, and that's one of the film's strengths): Walter Murch (sound editing; uncredited film editing) and Robert Duvall (THX himself) and Donald Pleasance (SEN!) and Lalo Schifrin (more than a match-lit march); not to mention the guys who helped without paychecks like Caleb Deschanel (Zooey's dad, yup, and famous DP) and Haskell Wexler (another famous DP and sometimes director). Plus, you know, all those ideas George stole from all those SF books he read, and movies he watched, growing up skinny and weak and powerless in the dusty furnace of the San Joaquin Valley (definite inspiration for Tatooine) dreaming of utopias beyond the sky. Or, as the case may be, distopias buried underground. --RWK

Genius Marketing #24 Striking Resemblances #2 Burn After Reading

I guess a simple "homage" tag may be a better phrase than "Striking Resemblances" but I wanted to go ahead and bump up that number a bit before eventually writing about how the 2008-09 Grizzlies will resemble the 2006-2008 Hawks (only they'll be better cuz they'll be more varied and they'll have Ovinton at off-guard). But enough of that. This is about how the Coens, aside from controlling every step of production, must have a say in their marketing campaigns, too. The goofy trailer makes Burn After Reading look like a funny version of the DC-specific elements of Syriana, Raising Arizona-style but this poster makes BAR (?) look like a goofy update on this old Saul Bass creation. I guess the movie could be similar, too, in that the Preminger picture took place in DC, but wasn't that some kind of self-aggrandizing exposé type of flick -- and Pulitzer-winning book? In any event, the poster is simple, the tagline funny, and my fanboy-mode is in full gear. I trust the Coen Brothers to make a picture about the current American "intelligence" quagmire sooner than I do a lot of other pompous lefty sloganeers like, say, Stephen Gaghan or Tony Gilroy -- because they're funnier, better and, on the whole, smarter filmmakers. They know about movement. Among other things. Like guns and dumb blabbermouths and language and editing and hypocrisy and America and low-angle set-ups and hiring Emmanuel Lubezski for their first picture without Roger Deakins since Miller's Crossing. They know their shit. --RWK

Songs #21: In Love With You -- UPDATED. AND AGAIN.

This is both more inside-baseball promotion (peep Claire's newest post) and a reminder that French Touch is relevant to everything, in every moment. Alan Braxe and Fred Falke should work together again. Or, I hope they do. They made some amazing stuff. Also, some really cheesy stuff. As Carlton said the other day, if the girl you're dating digs this song you know she's awesome. Because this is next level snobbery: embracing embarrassing sentimentality as pure sentiment, aka eating the cheese with a grin. Ultimately, though, this is what I sing in chorus with Claire to Tippi. --RWK

Alan Braxe & Fred Falke - In Love With You (zshare)

[Pix are dead giveaways in the link above. Melanie Daniels!]

UPDATE: Seen on The Cinetrix's Pullquote, a Tippi Hedren Barbie doll.

Claire just said in the "Murderous" comment thread: "Um, wow. If I were one to want things like that thing, I would want that thing. Instead, all I want is that 'Naomi Watts thang.'"

UPDATE THE SECOND, 7/24/08: From the 2008 Comic Con coverage at Spout Blog.

What Community? #37: The Yankees' grooming rules.

When Jason Giambi left so many Oakland Athletics fans crying there was a lot of fake news about how he'd have to clean up his look from everybody's nightmare of a biker (sleeveless t's showing off scary tats, long greasy hair in the face, a goatee for days) into one of the shrewd elite Steinbrenner demands his players transform into overnight. A similar discussion popped up about Johnny Damon's idiotic caveman look going away when he turned traitor to his beloved Sawks fans. Well, now they both live and work in New York and classy they have become. Or, maybe just Johnny Damon; at least he looks clean. Giambi, on the other hand, has taken a new route back to crazy. If you remember Don Mattingly (or see him on the bench), you know that the organization tolerates mustaches. Seems like Giambi bought into that. But what began as a kind of faint, vaguely funny look is now a scary, outright insane lifestyle choice. For all we know he could be riding that Harley upstate after games to blow off steam -- and murder happy, young couples necking on lovers lanes all over the NorthEast. Or, you know, he could simply be using the look to intimidate pitchers. Look at that on-air stat: since growing the 'stache, he's been on fire. Don't try to tell me his facial hair hasn't gotten into the heads of hurlers the country over. I know he's the best post-roids player ever but, sheesh, this is just another advantage he's using right in plain sight, an advantage condoned by the league and his team without comment, an advantage I'm surprised hasn't caught on across MLB. Just wait. By the next decade, everybody will be wearing a stache. Then it'll be the clean cut guys who look crazy -- and, of course, girly. --RWK

[Pic 1 is from June 24th, Pic 2 is from May 28th. There's talk that he's gone and died the stache for the ultimate in crazy.]

Encounter #88: They'll connect this time over in China.

I defer to Shoals:

If you didn't see or don't remember Kidd's FIBA performance, it was absolutely flawless, and something I can't wait to see recreated on an even bigger stage. The statline he ended up with doesn't appear striking (1.8 ppg, 3.3 rpg, and 4.6 apg in 15.9 mpg), but his two most important numbers were the just 10 shot attempts and 5 turnovers over the course of the 10 games. That second stat is especially staggering when one thinks back to the ridiculous array of passes he attempted. In particular, two of his botched passes stick out to me more than all of his successes: at one point he attempted a full-court bounce pass that weaved between three defenders, barely beating his streaking target to the spot. Even more impressive was the highlight of the entire tournament: the failed off-balance, off-the-backboard alley oop to LeBron from the 3-point line. Had LeBron connected (and he arguably should have), it would have gone down as the greatest pass I've ever seen.

--RWK

(NOT) Genius Marketing #23: Batman does not drink milk. Bruce Wayne drinks milk.

I just don't buy it. Actually, I don't buy milk anymore, either. But I do buy yogurt. Sweet, sweet Greek-style yogurt for my granola. I bet Bruce Wayne gets Alfred to order Greek-style yogurt straight from Greece, not Trader Joe's. Do you think there's a TJ's in Gotham? Like, right near Union Square? Er, Wayne Tower?

Also, this is the "new suit" Wayne asked for in the trailer? How much more high tech does it need to be? I know Nolan is after some amount of "realism" or whatever but this is borderline retarded. Luckily the movie will not be lit like this ad, though, and it will hide the designer's wet dream of gadgetry. --RWK [via]

Encounter #87: Jerk It

Thunderheist. Chickens. Leopard print. And, um, some sexuality. It's a hit. --RWK

Headlines #2: God accused of selling cocaine near church.

The report, in its entirety:

Police said a man named God was arrested near a Tampa church for selling cocaine.

Authorities began investigating God Lucky Howard in April, and he was arrested on Saturday. Police said he sold the cocaine to undercover detectives in his neighborhood. When officers searched his home, they reported finding 22 grams more of cocaine and a scale.

Jail records show Howard was charged with several counts of drug possession and distribution, which include increased charges for being within 1,000 feet of a church, a school and public housing.

Dude is not lucky. --RWK [via Keith]